1000 Years of Annoying the French

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At first I thought this book was going to be a piece of fiction, not reading much about it, the title appealed to me. This is a very long book, nearly 700 pages, as might be expected from a book that covers a millenium's worth of Anglo-French relations in great detail. The 'corrections' to the French interpretation of events were often amusing and enlightening, but I began to wonder how biased the 'factual' corrections were. Edith Piaf and Coco Chanel: both were pro Nazi (to add to the fun, on page 448 the Wehrmacht troops are depicted whistling “Non Rien de Rien”, a song that has only been written in 1960 by Charles Dumont. Not surprisingly, these aspects are key in establishing the book's unique charm - un très bon read, overall!

But exactly the same thing can be said about the French and the all English-speakers – no matter what we try to do in the present, the past will always march up and slap us in the face. There was almost no resistance on the islands, so compared to the French the islanders were a bunch of Nazi-sympathizers…right? The first big laugh I had was when Clarke described William II (informally known as Rufus) of England as "a medieval Paris Hilton" for his indulgences and a love of "make up, dresses and yappy little dogs".This book, as its name suggests, is a take on the history between England and France for the last ten centuries or so. Last year I asked my f-list to recommend to me their favorite "new" book that they had read in the past year (by "new" I mean "new to them").

During World War II, the British hated their French allies almost as much as they hated their Soviet allies. Beginning with William the Conqueror (not French) and ending with Nicolas Sarkozy (French), Clarke covers a fair bit of ground including food, battles, trade, battles, Canada, battles, wine, battles, Voltaire, battles, the French Revolution and battles.I think the book could have used a little bit of poking fun at the British every once in a while, to balance things out and make this interpretation of history come across as a bit more objective.

Luckily I have a French Canadian husband so he can do my speaking for me as I tend to freeze up when spoken to in French. Whenever in history the British suffered a loss, the author always comes up with a handy excuse or turns it around so that the British come out as the moral victors. The novel was an instant success and has led to numerous follow-ups, including Dial M for Merde (2008), 1,000 Years of Annoying the French (2010), and Paris Revealed (2011).After working as a journalist for a French press group for ten years, Paris-based Clarke now has a regular spot on French cable TV, poking fun at French culture.