personalised4u Speccy Twat Ceramic Coffee Mug

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This article needs additional citations for verification. Please help improve this article by adding citations to reliable sources. Unsourced material may be challenged and removed. Bill WeetaBixby - a one-off parody of The Incredible Hulk about Bill Bixby who turns into a violent piece of Weetabix when he' is confronted by muggers, only for them to promptly step on him.

Gordon's Grandad – one-off strip about a boy who believes his perfectly ordinary grandfather has magical powers. The strip ends with the death of the grandfather, devastating Gordon who believes that Grandad was about to build him a time machine. Morris Day: Sexual Pervert. A moustachioed, jumper-wearing middle-aged man who is obsessed with pornography, ignoring his attractive wife who waits for him in their bedroom. Kentish Town estate agents Morris Day changed their name to Day Morris around the time of the first appearance of this character.Buffalo Jill – a strip narrated in the style of 1950s–60s girls' comics, where a typical heroine from such comics (politely spoken and pony-loving) becomes a stagecoach robber in the Wild West, earning a vicious gang's respect by gorily shooting several people in the head. A reference to Buffalo Bill. Billy Bottom and his Zany Toilet Pranks – a literal toilet humour strip, based around a somewhat obese man and his attempts to defecate whilst various factors and circumstances conspire to prevent him from doing so. The first strip carried a spoof certificate of the type given to films by the BBFC, classifying the strip as "puerile". One of the latest has him as a caveman who is caught by the incoming Ice-Age, and is frozen solid for two million years. He is eventually freed by two archaeologists but the stink is so atrocious that he advises them 'I'd leave it for ten minutes if I were you!' Conceived by Tom Bambridge. The Intern - A strip telling the story of Tom Golightly, who dreams of being an advertising executive and in 1981 manages to get himself a one-year unpaid internship. The internship ends up lasting decades, as Tom waits to get a paid position at his firm even as he is constantly passed over for jobs (despite making the company a fortune with successful advertising campaigns, with his bosses taking all the credit) due to nepotism. Finally in March 2020 Tom's patience pays off and he is finally given a paid job at the firm, albeit as a mere teaboy. Unfortunately on the day Tom is due to begin his actual employment with the company at which he has worked at unpaid for almost 40 years (which is also his 61st birthday) he is told he is being furloughed due to the COVID-19 pandemic, with the firm folding a couple of months later. Krystle's Big Chance – an American teenage girl bullied for having one very slightly crooked front tooth; until she goes to an orthodontist, whereupon her classmates award her prom queen and hail her as beautiful despite her now wearing huge, ungainly dental braces. A parody of Americans who aspire to orthodontics while stereotyping British people as having bad teeth.

Colin the Amiable crocodile strips centred on a small crocodile named Colin. In one strip he was shot by a birdwatcher because he said "hello" to the man. The character also appeared later on front covers of other issues, such as with a skinhead who tells people to buy the comic or he shoots the croc. Tex Wade – "Frontier Accountant"; cowboy desperado and financial auditor who shoots dead anyone who crosses his path (and fails to balance their books properly). John Logie Baird – A strip about the Scottish inventor who makes a machine that spouts out faeces. His rival from next door, the Italian inventor known as Guglieimo Marconi, is envious, so tries to outdo the Scottish inventor by making a machine that spouts out testicles. The strip ends with the two surprised by the English inventor Tim Berners-Lee and his machine that spouts out male and female reproductive systems. Ivan Jelical – an evangelistic fundamentalist Christian whose proselytising is spectacularly unsuccessful. He is only ever happy when he is God-bothering, "comforting" grieving widows with descriptions of their husbands' (supposed) sufferings in Hell and getting himself beaten up in the process. On one occasion, after failing to convert a single person all day he hung himself (though this did not stop him reappearing alive in a new strip a few months later). He (and his fellow evangelists) are often portrayed with "spinning" eyes, a display of their unawareness of the real world.

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Copper Kettle - quoted as "The PC who loves his PG" (PG meaning tea brand PG Tips), the strip follows the life of the policeman and his futile attempts to obtain some tea—his favourite beverage—while on his beat. Ben and the SpaceWalrus – a one-off strip centred on a fat kid named Ben who finds a SpaceWalrus and eats his dog Bunny. Electric Space Copter Kid – A boy who thinks he is a superhero with an "electric space copter" that is actually just a space hopper. He accidentally stops a fleeing robber (who crashes his getaway vehicle, distracted by the space hopper) and wins an award from the police.

Scum Mothers, Who'd 'Ave 'Em? – Occasional strip created by Barney Farmer and Lee Healey (also responsible for the Drunken Bakers, George Bestial and Hen Cabin), in which a middle-class couple are continually embarrassed by the man's drunken, foul-mouthed mother and her various thuggish boyfriends. The title appears to be a play on Some Mothers Do 'Ave 'Em. Quentin Tarranteeny – a parody portraying Quentin Tarantino as an extremely foul-mouthed baby who speaks as if delivering a monologue in one of Tarantino's films. Il Duce, Old Duce – A strip featuring Benito Mussolini who wants the people of the town to bow down to his fascist dictatorship, but his hippie father keeps ruining his day. The Lager Lads – somewhat like the Real Ale Twats, these are a group of clean cut, upstanding beer aficionados who like lager more than anything. Inevitably, barmen tell them to "piss off" or urinate in their beer. The Lads never seem to notice there's anything wrong with their drinks after this happens, both highlighting the weak flavour of lager compared to other beer and showing the Lads up to be idiots. The strips were inspired by a series of advertisements for McEwan's lager, in which - Chris Donald noted - a group of smiling, happy young men drink copious amounts of lager but never "got pissed or glassed anybody".

Jellyhead – The girl with no brain. A one-off superhero parody about a girl born with lime jelly instead of a brain. Jellyhead spends her entire time in this story in a catatonic state, yet still manages to foil an armed robbery. The one-off strip was the work of Charlie Higson. Ivor the Skiver – "His dad's a bad driver". One-off strip in which a boy begs his father for a lift as he is too lazy to walk to school. Due to Ivor's dad having poor road sense, they are involved in a crash and end up seriously injured in the hospital, where they are reminded that it was Saturday and Ivor did not have to go to school anyway. Beeny of the Lamp – An Aladdin parody in which Sarah Beeny comes out of a magic lamp to help a young couple wishing for advice on buying a property. Gilbert Ratchet – a boy who can invent anything, usually to solve people's bizarre "problems" as he comes across them. However, his inventions invariably cause far more problems of their own. Usually, the entire premise of the strip turns out to be a highly contrived misunderstanding. Gilbert's creator, Davey Jones, describes the character as "like (the Dandy's) Screwy Driver—only with more genital mutilation of vicars". Boswell Boyce - He Throws His Voice - An incompetent ventriloquist who repeatedly tries and fails to become famous.

Joe, 90 - A once-only spoof of the iconic character. The World Intelligence Agency decides to recruit Joe for a new mission, despite the fact he is now in his 90s and extremely frail. He is briefed on the dangerous mission (despite such a venture obviously being both physically and mentally beyond him) and placed in the 'Big Rat', only for him to die while his abilities are transferred. The strip ends with the agency deciding to call International Rescue.Boy Scouse – a gang of delinquent schoolboys from Liverpool who earn Boy Scout badges for mugging pensioners, spraying graffiti and other such antisocial activities. MP Louise Ellman complained that it set a bad example and petitioned to have it banned. [4] [5] Raffles, Gentleman Thug – a late 19th-century aristocrat who behaves like a stereotypical 21st-century thug. Farmer Palmer – a paranoid, money-grubbing farmer with an inbred son whose catch phrase is "Get orf moi laaaand!" Student Grant – an upper middle-class student at Fulchester (or sometimes Spunkbridge) University, who is determined to be fashionably "right on" and a left-wing radical, though when things go wrong, it's always his " bourgeois" rich parents that bail him out. Grant does little or no work for his degree. One strip had him visiting his department (he had to be directed by a friend) to see his personal tutor, who pointed out that he had not handed in a single essay in three years. The terms seem ridiculously short (4 weeks in one case, the Christmas vacation lasting from mid-November to late March). When UK students received a maintenance grant and free tuition Student Grant appeared in most issues. In late 2010/early 2011, Grant reappeared again following the student riots against tuition fees, ending up in a "taxi" that turns out to be a limousine carrying Prince Charles and the Duchess of Cornwall. He has a number of friends just like him, eager to express their individuality by wearing the same clothes, fashions, invariably ridiculous, like huge hats, bright yellow dungarees and T-shirts with slogans on them like Thunderbirds Are Go! and, in the late 1990s especially, Teletubbies Say 'Eh Oh'!. They are opinionated and talk loudly and ignorantly about various subjects, tagging "...actually!" at the end of their sentences, "proving" their intelligence by listing the grades they got in their A-levels. Several of Grant's collegiate friends have bizarre speech impediments, dental deformities or both. Lazy Disinterested 16 Year-Old Photo Shop Girl – a teenage girl who works in a local photo supply shop. She has a very unenthusiastic attitude, and is unhelpful to her customers; preferring to chew lots of bubblegum and text on her mobile phone for hours on end. Similar strips have the "Lazy Disinterested 16-Year-Old" working in a shoe shop and a chip shop - the latter seeing her rather talk to a friend (possibly her boyfriend) than serve anyone, and being extremely slow and deliberately uninterested when she does serve someone. Her equally unhelpful counterparts are sometimes featured, including "Ugly Miserable Butch Bus Driver Lady" and "35-Year-Old Obsessive War Workshop Assistant" (An older man so obsessed with role-playing games that when a boy tries to buy two sets of figures from different sets, he will only sell one or the other, but not both as they "are from different scenarios").